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Post by be A F R A I D -rogue- on Oct 16, 2008 23:04:16 GMT -5
this sounds EMOish but I think it's pretty good ^^ please leave commentsBreaking through the door
Falling through the hole
Screaming from the core
Fire burning as black as ink
Make my day and rip... into my skin
Watch me fall from my bed in heaven
Watch me break through the barrier
Watch me scream to you in misery
Watch me crawl from under the blood covered clouds
Falling rain bounds my heart
As fire licks my skin
Blood pounds my inner soul
As a river of ink comes flowing in
to my... mind
Watch me fall from my bed in heaven
Watch me fade into the night
Watch me swallow up the shadow
Watch me crawl from under the blood covered decay
Watch me fall
(repeat 2x)
From my mind
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Post by Sunrise on Oct 16, 2008 23:13:20 GMT -5
It's great! <3
I've never been able to write very good poetry, so I always admire when others write a really good peice ^^
It does sound 'Emo-like', but I'm not a big fan of using the word emo to describe poetry, or any form of writing, because I like to write sad stuff, but I do not consider any of it emo, or myself emo at all and it just turns out that I get in some awkward position where people are calling me emo and I get really made xDD
(sorry for my rambling there)
So yeah, I really like it, especially the third stanza/second verse thing. The falling rain bounds my skin part. =]
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Post by be A F R A I D -rogue- on Oct 16, 2008 23:19:19 GMT -5
Thank you dear Sunrise... my friend called it a emo poem so thats what I put, it's about someone being killed while their friend/lover just sits there and watch... |
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Zeddicus Zu'l Zorander
Aroused Writer
Another J, another day goes by, sittin' round the house, hangin' out, gettin' high...
Posts: 334
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Post by Zeddicus Zu'l Zorander on Oct 17, 2008 15:33:50 GMT -5
'Emo'? Pssh. I guess it has 'emo' qualities, but it speaks in anger to me. ie; "watch me scream to you in misery." I take scream as angry scream. XD However, I am an angry person so I guess that's why I would view it in anger. :P
-agrees with Sunrise on the 'emo' part- [/blockquote] |
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ebony
Novice Writer
O_o
Posts: 23
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Post by ebony on Oct 18, 2008 19:55:18 GMT -5
That's really great! I don't find it very emo... well, I guess you could call it that, but not everything that is sad/angry etc. should be defined by the word "emo". I always like to write melancholy sort of things anyway, though my life isn't very tragic. I guess it's because I want something different now and then... I dunno. I'm confusing myself!
Anyways, I love your poem!! It's sort of like a song, right?
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Post by be A F R A I D -rogue- on Oct 19, 2008 21:20:36 GMT -5
Thanks guys <33
And yesh Ebony it can be a song if someone can find a good tune and rhythm for it but it's mostly a poem ^^ |
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